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014 Charlotte The Harlot(Sung
to the tune of "Sweet Betsy From Pike") CHORUS:She's filthy, she's nasty,
She spits on the floor, Charlotte the Harlot, the
cowpuncher's whore. Way out in the wild west
where the bullshit lies thick, Where the women are women and
the cowboys come quick, There lives a fair maiden of
forty or more, Charlotte the Harlot, the
cowpuncher's whore. She's handy, she's bandy, she
screws in the street, Whenever you meet her she's
always in heat, If you leave your fly open
she's after your meat, And the small of her c**t
knocks you right off your feet. She's easy, she's breezy,
she's my hearts delight, I'll f**k her by day and f**k
her by night, And each time I f**k her she
shouts out, "Encore," I call that great f**king and
I want some more. One night on the prairie
while riding along, One hand on my pistol and one
on my dong, What should I spy but the
maid I adore, Charlotte the Harlot, the
cowpuncher's whore. One night I was riding way
down by the falls, One hand on my pistol, the
other on my balls, What should I see but
Charlotte using a stick, Instead of the end of a
cowpuncher's prick. One night on the desert her
legs opened wide, A rattlesnake saw it and
climbed up inside, Now all the cowboys on
Saturday night, Come see the vagina that
rattles and bites. I leapt from my saddle and
reached for her crack, But the damn thing was
rattling and bit me back, I pulled out my six gun and
aimed for its head, But the damn thing misfired
and shot Charlotte instead. I caressed her, undressed
her, and laid her down there, And parted the tresses of
curly brown hair, Inserted the penis of my
sturdy horse, And then there began a
strange intercourse. Faster and faster went my
sturdy steed, Until Charlotte rejoiced at
the speed, When all of a sudden my horse
did backfire, And shot Charlotte right into
the mire. He got Charlotte all covered
in muck, And said, "Oh dear,
cowboy, what a glorious f**k," She stepped a pace forward
and fell flat on the floor, And that was the end of the
cowpuncher's whore. The funeral procession was
forty miles long, And all of the cowboys were
singing the song, "Here lies a maiden who
never kept score, Charlotte the Harlot, the cowpuncher's whore." |
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